Dear Self,
In the past years, I've silenced you. I shut all the emotions that could break the made up imaged that I created to the world. I made people believe that you are an independent, intelligent and strong woman who can handle everything. And I did everything that I could to keep it that way without even thinking about the consequences that it might destroy you in the end. And now, you are paying the price of my decision and I am so sorry.
I never wish to break your heart. I did everything that I did because that's what I thought was right. I thought the world doesn't need someone who has a soft heart. I thought that you should be mature and has all the answers that the world has thrown on you. But despite my good intention, I made things worse and broke your heart in the process.
And I'm sorry for all the things that you went through because of my decisions. I'm sorry for all the times I put others best interest first before you. I just did everything that I did because that's what I thought was right. I never wish to break your heart. And if only I could take away the pain, I will do it in a heartbeat. But I know things didn't work that way. I know the aftermath of these will take time to heal and fix.
But I hope one day you'll able to forgive me for all the mistakes and wrong decisions that I made. I hope one day, I'll find completely healed and happy. And I hope that day comes because you deserve to live a happy life.
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
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